Halle Berry’s increasingly acrimonious custody battle with Gabriel Aubrey has today sparked a debate about racial identity that has the world talking about their divorce and their daughter. Although the couple initially attempted to keep their divorce private we now have a battle being played out in the media spotlight with accusations being thrown around from both sides.
While this battles titillates the world’s desire for watching real life soap operas, caught unknowingly in the middle is a two year old child. The Daily Mail this morning included the following line: “It’s no small mercy that little Nahla is too young to fully understand what her parents are putting her through”.
Her young age may be a blessing for now but what about the future? It seems inevitable that she will at some point sit in front of google and find out what her parents were saying about each other and how the world judged her parent’s actions.
And when the battle gets this heated it is hard to see a future where the two can provide a positive experience for co-parenting her. Words and actions said today will inevitably affect the child’s future. Contrasts can be made with Madonna and Guy Ritchie’s amicable divorce at the end of 2008 where reports suggest the couple still talk and cooperate with parenting.
If you are contemplating divorce you may start off like Halle Berry and Gabriel Aubrey wanting to have a friendly divorce only to see this ambition fail. There may be no easy solution to the hurt that has caused the breakdown but if the desire is there to try and divorce amicably for the good of your children’s futures then you should talk to a collaboratively trained family lawyer about a collaborative divorce. Where there are tough obstacles to overcome the skills and experience of a collaborative divorce lawyer, possibly together with those of a family consultant with experience helping couples deal with the divorce process, can help you set a positive tone for the future.